i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize