we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
