Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize