Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
