My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
