this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
