Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
