My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
