my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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