so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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