He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I cut my penus on the lid.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize