Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
