He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
