we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
