We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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