When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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