My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
