it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
