question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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