sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
try to milk me bitch
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