the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
