Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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