This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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