Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
