If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
