the condom got lost in my hair
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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