yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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