It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
