True but thats because hes a fetus.
oh god the rape fog is back!
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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