I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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