No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
