butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
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