Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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