I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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