he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
