Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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