My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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