You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just gargled with NyQuil
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
