so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
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