whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Randomize