he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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