When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
