I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
