I'm drive I can fine osifer
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You're earring is so big in my mouth
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
