Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
