hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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