Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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