your thong is hanging out like whoa
barbara walters just said penis...
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
