omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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