You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
