idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
