Tell her she can't have a vagina
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Randomize
