Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
