Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize