Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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